My heart have been bruised, cut deep and felt excruciating pain that no one could see. I carried shame and guilt for so many years. The more I hide the truth, the more anger manifested itself out. The more I suppress the truth, the more I was lying to myself and lived in denial.
How about you, do you have a dark secret that you’ve been keeping?
I believe I have spoken about my past traumatic experiences time and time again where I was sexually abused at the age of sixteen by my dad. When I migrated in the U.S.A., that’s when the abused took place. I was controlled, manipulated and he made me believed that what he did was acceptable. Sometimes, I wondered whether or not I was mentally retarded for accepting and believing what he told me was the truth that made me believe. I kept that secret for almost ten years because of guilt and shame. I carried that secret with me where ever I went. No wonder I was dealing with outburst of anger, shame and suicidal thoughts. I have dealt with these emotions for so many years that I was so desperate a need of healing. And today, I will share some of the ways I have overcome my traumatic experiences.
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These are some of the steps that helped me overcome my traumatic experiences:
The truth will set you free.Jesus
- Talk it out. Find a trustworthy friend or a family member to share your deepest secret that you have been keeping, and I guarantee you, you’ll feel much better. This is the first process. I felt so much better the moment I shared my secret to my best friend in college. However, the mistake I have done was sharing it to my ex-boyfriend who would used it against me. Be careful to whom you share your secrets with. This person would used it during our arguments to gaslight and humiliate me. I felt even worse and asked myself why I even bothered sharing my secret. It was as if, Satan was taunting me. So, pray for the right person to share it with.
2. Seek professional help. I sought numerous Counseling. If you are more comfortable sharing your secret with a professional Counselors then you may want to do so. Professional Counselors helped me in some ways, but it didn’t completely healed me. From my previous experiences, I wasn’t really comfortable during the hypnotic sessions, and I ended up not going anymore. There are plenty of Psychologists out there, so choose wisely that will support your well-being and your complete healing.
3. Reading God’s Word. As I have took a hold of the bible, that’s when I have used it for my healing and deliverance. The word of God has a way to shift our thoughts about ourselves and to sift through the lies we have been believing about our situation and our past pain as Hebrews 4:12 says,
For the word of God is living and powerful and sharper than any two edge sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit and of joints and marrow, and is a a discerner the thoughts and intents of the heart.
4. Pray & Offer Forgiveness. It easier to take matters into your hands and hold grudges. It is easier to withhold unforgiveness to those who have hurt you, but it will only bring you to bondage. You are only going to suffer more than the person who have caused you pain. “Confess your trespasses to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed.”
Remember that healing is a process, and it takes time. As time goes by the easier it will get. Just trust the process. I can openly share my story now because I believe God had completely healed me. But it took time for me to even admit it without getting too emotional.
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Additional books on overcoming trauma: Link below