Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Exhausted and weary mothers! You are not alone! It seems as though the struggle never ends and the struggle is real. Raising children and family in this age is rather exhausting sometimes your patience is tested on so many levels. A few days ago, my emotions got the best of me. My son threw a tantrum and kicked the chair and had a major attitude. I easily vacillated from being calm and collected to screaming and yelling.

This is how it starts, I allowed my son to play on his tablet for approximately 2-3 hours a day right after we do his school work in the morning. Now that we have been staying at home, I have tried to stick to a structured schedule. My son and I do a little bit of reading, spelling, math, and history. After lunch, I let him play his game Roblox. It took me a while to actually allow my son to play this game because he was too young, but he gets bored just watching tv and we haven’t been going outside in the park when COVID-19 took place. 

I was wondering to myself, is there a correlation between letting my son play this game that led him to develop such aggressive behavior?

Triggers?

These were my triggers: I told him to stop at 3:05, 3:05 turns to 3:10, 3:10 turns to 3:30. When I finally had enough and made him stop playing his game, he threw a fit. He screamed and yelled that I didn’t tolerate so obviously I took away his tablet. As soon as I turned around he kicked the couch. I asked the question, why he would such a thing? The moment my son lied changed the whole scenario when he went on saying he didn’t kick it on purpose but rather it was an accident. That’s when I put him on a time out and scolded him for it. 

I am sure if you are a parent and a mother, you know how frustrating raising a child can be. In retrospect, I could have probably responded differently and not let my emotions get the best of me. Later that night, before I went to bed, I asked God what could have I done differently in disciplining my son?

What could have I done differently in disciplining my son?

He led me to the Zechariah 4:6, “Not by might, nor by power, but My spirit.” 

My spirit I believe refers to the fruit of the spirit that is discussed in the book of Galatians 5:22, “But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

There were two things that stood out for me here that I could have applied during the time my son threw a fit. One – gentleness and two is self-control. I was overtaken by my emotion. Therefore, I did not respond in a moving loving way. Right after the time out, I have to sit him down and discuss why I had to take away his tablet and put him on time out. 

I believe the younger our children learn about consequences the better. Younger children still need guidance. Their brain is not fully developed or matured yet that they can still be teachable and moldable. It will be too late when we wait when they become teenagers. 

These are things I expect from my son to do are to obey and to listen. The same principles God expects from us, His children. Although God has given us the gift of free will. However, there are consequences when we obey Him and vice versa when we disobey God Him.

As a mother, we can’t be perfect. However, we must learn to forgive ourselves and not beat ourselves up when we make a mistake. It is okay not to be okay. As a mother, we must learn to decompress by taking good care of ourselves mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Look Within

Consider the following of why your fused was short. Possibly due to hormonal, lack of sleep, and stress. Lately, I haven’t been sleeping well. I have been sleep-deprived. When I don’t get enough sleep I can’t function at an optimal level. I sometimes feel guilty of just sitting around and not doing anything because I feel as though I am wasting my time. But necessary.

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